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Theory Can Work In Real Life
photo credit: the_toe_stubber
The other day, I came across a folder containing text from a university distance education course I did at work 2 years ago (the course was a diploma in contract management). I quickly flicked through the folder and I saw this random gem under the topic of negotiations:
Communications Irritators
Avoid using communications irritators. Terms such as “our generous offer”, “we are being very reasonable about this” and “your selfish behaviour” are terms which have minimal effect in persuading the other party but do cause irritation and create barriers to resolving the issue at hand.
No kidding. Wow, the things you learn at university!
Unfortunately communications irritators are all too common in the sales arena. Real estate and used card sales come to mind as the worst perpetrators.
Have I Got a Deal for You!
I recall some years ago when wanting to buy a used car and I had a limited budget at the time, I found a car that seemed suitable and I was quite interested in buying it, but it was above my price range.
The smarmy sales person gave me “a special deal that he doesn’t normally do but he was doing it just for me” (yeah right and I was born yesterday). He offered a very good price – it was strictly on the condition that I take up that offer within an hour.
I said I would think about it and left. I deliberately chose to go back a few minutes after his “special offer” had closed. Clutching a thick wad of $50 notes, I said I would like to buy the car and his eyes lit up.
As we walked towards his office to finalise the deal I could tell the smarmy salesperson was mentally counting his $$$hare of the deal. I looked at my watch and said something like “ Oh darn I just realised I came in after the offer expired, good bye” I quickly turned my back on him and walked out.
I have no idea what his reaction was. I kept walking and did not turn around to have a look – I was mighty tempted though. I was actually quite keen on the car too and so far it had been the best deal I had come across. I refused on principle to be bullied into a deal like this and was optimistic that a better deal was around the corner.
Happy Ending
The happy ending to this tale is that the next day I found a much much much better car for only $500 more. This little car has been fantastic. It is wonderfully reliable with no problems at all mechanically and is super economical with fuel. My partner John drives it to work and only has to fill up fuel once every 4 weeks!
Going back to the text again - yes they were right the sales person’s words did have minimal effect in persuading the other party and yes it did cause irritation and created barriers to resolving the issue at hand (I wanted to buy a car and smarmy pants wanted to sell a car). Don’t you just love it when theory actually works in real life situations?
What communications irritators have you come across in general negotiations, sales or similar situations? How have you reacted? Have you got any good come backs you would like to share?
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Meta
Hi Leanne,
I like your style. You showed him the colour of your money…. disappearing out of the door. Hehehe.
I recently fell foul of a salesman who called at the door selling frozen ‘luxury’ food. He got me at a time when I was feeling harassed and I was easily sucked in. Now this goes against my better judgement, because I NEVER buy at the door.
Anyway, this total git was trying to sell me 200 quids worth of food, whereas I was only in the market of 1/10th that value. No matter what I said he wouldn’t listen. In the end I had to be very explicit and found the experience very uncomfortable.
I ended up buying some food and boy was it good but I’ll never buy from him again. The next time he calls at my door I’ll tell him why. I think he at least deserves to learn from the experience, just as I did.
Dave
Hi Dave
Yeah I feel uncomfortable too when in a situation where I want the product they are selling but the sales person is pressuring me to buy a lot more than I really want.
I have never really thought about giving feedback to sales people like you suggested. After all they are just trying to make a living and a little constructive feedback wouldn’t go astray.
That’s a great story Leanne - I love it! What an awesome way to beat him at his own game.
I get calls for printer toner cartridges at work. Their offer is to give you a free trial, and a “substantially lower price than we’re currently paying” - even though they have no idea what we currently pay. How do they really know they are cheaper - they don’t! I don’t even listen to them - I just hang up. It’s rude, I know, but I just can’t stand talking to these people.
Lances last blog post..Sunday Thought For The Day
Hi Lance
Telephone sales are annoying - I have a similar curt reponse too. “I am not interested, goodbye” and then hang up. The only one who has got through to me is childhood cancer selling raffle tickets. Now when they ring I just say hey you don’t have to do your big spiel on me I will buy the usual one book.
Do they really have to tell you not to say “your selfish behaviour?” I must be more of a natural salesperson than I thought!
This reminds me of the King of the Hill episode where Hank was so pleased with his negotiating ability. Over a period of many years, he arranged to buy four cars at the special price his salesman offered just to him: “sticker price, and not a penny more!”
Hi Hunter
Yep they sure did say that. I copied the text word for word from the manual. The funny thing is I work for the Australian Government and this course was supposedly government specific.
Hi Leanne,
I love your car buying story. That salesman must have dropped his jaw when you turned and left.
I hate the one where they say, “This is the last one, it won’t last long”. I’ll just say, “well, I guess it just wasn’t meant to be, as I’m not buying today”.
Barbara Swaffords last blog post..Charity Starts At Home
Hi Barbara
I have heard the one about the last one left too. Looks like shonky sales people cover all corners of the globe.
I would have loved to have seen the look on the salesmans face!
I had a door to door salesman come to visit me on Monday night actually. I had just taken a bite out of my dinner, when I heard a knock on the door. I was going to ignore it, but thought it might be someone important.
Alas, it was someone trying to change me over to a different electricity supplier. He started talking and I just interupted him with “I’m not interested, sorry” to which he asked “you don’t want to save money on your electricity bill” I just said “No”, he gave me a puzzled look and walked away!
I feel sorry for door knockers and telemarketers, because I know they have a job to do, but I am just against the concept in principle, it always feels like an intrusion to me.
Hi Leanne - I don’t blame you for walking out. I’ve came across many communication irritators. I used to own a franchise and one of the guys at the Head Office was a real …hole. He always used them, verbally and in writing.
Stuff like ……the generous help we gave you. And the one that really sucked - we’re being really kind and helpful to you because a single parent with too small children isn’t really suited to this type of business.
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Hi Lauren
I agree with you about it being intrusive. I feel a bit sorry for telemarketers etc too. I wonder sometimes whether any of them enjoy their work. I suspect 99% don’t.
Hi Cath
Hard to believe people stoop to that level and belittle people like that. What he said was even worse than the text book examples from my course. And yes you weren’t suited to THAT business because you were too good for them!